29.

For what seems like an hour, but could only be thirty seconds, we stare at one another. This might be romantic if we weren't such pricks. Come on you cocksucker, do your fucking job. I can tell he's breaking, he'd rather just give in and get this over with. My sneer cracks into this asshole-ish grin and I decide to push him over. I'll be the bigger man and extend the olive branch. "Just gimme the shot and the beer and I'll leave. Simple as that. It ain't fucking brain surgery." I grin wider, enjoying my own animosity. I hear the bones in his fingers crack and pop as he tightens his grip on the bar. His eyes flicker about, like humming birds in constant motion, while he's considering the terms of his surrender. He yields in a great flurry of hate and frustration. He swears and curses at me with no attempt at subtlety. That's okay, I'm not so subtle either. I can't help but realize I sure have been getting in to a lot of verbal altercations lately. I must not be very likable. Maybe it's because I'm such a crazy dick. He pours me a shot of cheap gin and slams a can of Pabst Blue Ribbon on the bar. He's trying to be funny, giving me cheap gin and the nastiest bear available. My grin grows larger and I pound the shot quick and easy. It's harsh and tastes as if I just licked a pine tree. I remember stealing gin from my father when I was 14. I didn't understand what kind of booze was made for shooting or for mixing or for sipping so I just it shot it all. I remember pounding shots of gin till I puked one new year's eve. Oh to be young again. I slam my shot glass down and mutter out, "Just like momma used to make 'em". Heh heh. I reach for the beer but he grabs it first. He starts to shake it wildly, his motion reminiscent of a thirteen year old who just discovered masturbation. His lips curl, his tongue juts out as he's about to reach climax. I hate this fucking prick but I do admire his creativity and conviction. He gave in a bit but he's still gonna make this whole ordeal as hard and difficult as possible. I pick up the can and put it in my back pocket. I'll deal with it later. "Thank you for the lovely experience. I'll be sure to post about it on Yelp."