23.

I hurry off hoping to flee the scene before any cops arrive. I can't see anyone around and I hope if anyone did see me, I'd be written off as just another bum. Fuck, for resenting being judged as if I were a bum, I sure am embracing it now. My vision is blurry and I could never even hope to walk a straight line. It's only mid day but it feels freezing suddenly. I stagger towards an alley. I need a minute to clear my mind and rid myself of what I just witnessed. I was one of the last people to see that man alive. What a terrible burden. I'm far too weak and sad for this. I plop down in the ally and open the terrible can of liquid. I need to forget and I need to do anything to raise the blood closer to the surface of my skin. As close as it can get to bursting right out. I chug the filth and anoint myself in its depravity. I drink the can in one long desperate gasp as if cleansing myself of the memories. God, give me brain damage. I start to cry and close my eyes. Alone in the alley weeping, I black out.